The Harris Teeter Super Doubles Event (HTSDE) has been over for more than a week and our accountant Missy Sippy, from the accounting firm of Bright & Early, has finally tabulated the totals of our shopping trips.
My totals:
Shelf Price - $586.97
OOP - $53.17
90% Savings
And the winner of the HTSDE Amazing Race is...Sleeping Beauty
Shelf price - $458.35
OOP - $25.25
95% Savings
And she still has $15 in catalinas that she can spend on a future shopping trip.
I salute you, my dear friend, Sleeping Beauty. I bow down to your shopping greatness.
To my loyal friends and fans, the next time you see Sleeping Beauty give her the unofficial one-finger salute...just for me!
**Pinch**
What can I say? Where are the wine and roses? Thank you! You taught me WELL!
ReplyDeleteWell, I have been whining all day. You beat me. I accept defeat. And you want roses???? I have a few thorns I can throw your way. I'm not bitter. Not at all! I do think we should fire Missy Sippy...I don't think she does a good job. My loss is all her fault.
ReplyDeleteAnd another thing...my lawyer Max E. Pad from the law firm Rush, Rush & DeLay will be in contact with you tomorrow regarding compensation for the public humiliation I have suffered. I want that new coupon bag you bought yesterday at Rite Aid. I will settle for nothing less than that!!!
ReplyDeleteOkay, let's settle things up. My attorney Mr. Ham B. Helper will be answering any calls on my behalf. It is my understanding you have violated the Chex Mix Act, and have been hoarding things in your garage. Mr. Pinch said so himself. He will be required to testify.
ReplyDeleteAs far as my new coupon bag in reference to your above comment I checked on the definition of extortion : Law . the crime of obtaining money or some other thing of value by the abuse of one's office or authority.
So I ask Ms. Pinch are you abusing your authority by making such a public demand? Remember my new coupon bag was only 83 cents.
Just the facts mam.......
You are going to throw thorns at me.(at least it isn't Chex Mix)
you are not bitter. (that is because of your Pillsbury Sweet Rolls)
You have been whinning all day. (I have seen your collectible wine collection)
You are going to fire poor Missy Sippy. (she can't help she is crooked)
You have contacted your attorney Max E. Pad(Yep, I have seen you slip in and walk all over those)
You require compensation. (to be paid in uncut and/or uncirculated coupons, no doubt)
You have public humiliation.(only while having an encounter with a cranky cashier that doesn't have a clue what to do with coupons)
You have suffered. (I know the aches and pains of carrying that bag with your coupon binder and tons of 12 packs of drink, 8 packs of bottled water, bags of Hamburger Helper, boxes of Capri Sun, cereal, cheese, etc.)
And you are trying to extort my 83 cent new coupon bag. I guess we will have our day in court. I will be requesting a jury trial.
We will be needing 12 desperate housewives with nothing better to do to solve this.
And just to make things clear I will not give up my new fugly coupon bag. But somebody has a birthday coming up soon. We will see what is in store by then.
I take exception to what you wrote...your bag is NOT fugly. It is very High School Musical! I can see it now, you will dance and sing through the aisles of Target. Warn me first, because I might wet my pants! Clean up on Aisle One.
ReplyDelete